I love to write. I didn’t discover my love for writing until about 10 ears ago when I was desperately looking for some way to release all the feelings and emotions that I was carrying inside. I very quickly discovered the beautiful healing and the peace that can come from putting my thoughts and feelings down on paper. Then, through my writing, something happened. I started to see the world differently. Everywhere I turned there was a story, a moment to capture, a tender mercy, and miracles. I began to see God’s hand in everything. Every tear, every moment of laughter, every head turned downward, every tragedy, trial, milestone, achievement, everything. Over the last few years, I have lost that sight. I have allowed my busy life to blind me from those precious moments. Slowly, feelings of not being adequate for the tasks at hand, feelings of not being ENOUGH, have crept into every crevice of my heart.

As I have allowed myself to believe these feelings had to be true, I felt JOY sucked from my heart and from my home. I long to have it back. I have decided that now is the time in my life for me to begin my journey for JOY. I deserve to be happy. I want to rejoice in the precious, timeless moments that my Heavenly Father has given me with my family, and I want to believe that I AM ENOUGH FOR JOY. I am enough of a mom, enough of a wife, enough of a friend, a leader, a sister, enough of a woman to have Joy in my heart every second of every day. I AM ENOUGH. Join me on my JOURNEY FOR JOY.


Monday, January 6, 2014

Watching my parents leave- January 6, 2014

January 6th, 2014


Today, standing at the airport watching my parents walk away, I had a funny feeling.  A feeling I didn't really become familiar with until I became a parent myself. 

My parents arrived home from Canada a short month ago to spend the holidays with us. It has been wonderful having them here but hard as well. They both have been sick, making it hard for them to enjoy their time. Many of the last few days have been spent laying on my couch, or taking naps instead of laughing and running around with grandchildren. As I have tended to their needs, made them chicken noodle soup, forced them to take medication and use essential oils hoping they would improve before leaving, I began to worry, like a mother does, about sending them out of the country on a cruise ship for almost a month. 

Today, standing at the airport watching them walk away, I had a funny feeling. That feeling that comes when you send your child out to do hard things. That feeling you get when you watch your child perform at a piano or dance recital, holding your breath hoping that they would do okay and know that there best was good enough. It was the feeling of leaving your children with the care of a babysitter for the first time, or the anxiousness you get when you wait in a doctors office to find out what is ailing your sick child.  Its a feeling of worry, of anticipation, of concern, of longing, of excitement all wrapped up in the brief 30 seconds that it took for them to disappear out of sight. 

I am excited for my parents. I know that their journey will be full of adventures.  I am already counting down the days when they return and get to meet their newest grandchild, born while they are somewhere far way walking with penguins. I am grateful for the gift of feeling. The gift of emotion.  Today, for but a brief moment, I perhaps experienced what our Heavenly parents felt when they sent each of us out into this great big world to experience life.  I anticipate their arrival home, just as our Heavenly Mother and Father anticipate our arrival home, with luggage packed full of life experience, memories and spiritual treasures. 

Love you Mom and Dad!

Juli




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